I thought it was a myth...MYTH MYTH!

Yes????

Anyway, so I've heard for years this poppycrap about how exercise helps you feel less stressed and assists in the coping with stress. This sounded like a total bunch of hype made up by people with lab coats who eat wheat germ and carob or whatever.

Guess what though. It's totally true. Jason and I had our first official work out at the YMCA last night and I gotta tell ya....I was stressed OUT before hand due to work BS but 45 mins on the cardio and I felt clear headed and ready to get fit. I've never felt like that before. I slept great which is REALLY new to me and I felt.....wait for it.....good about myself. I guess these hippy doctor wheat germ freaks were right on many counts.

I honestly can't wait to get back there tonight! That is so unlike me I almost feel like I've been body snatched. Whatever works.

All this time I've been trying to eat a ton less to lose weight but all along I could have been working out AND not hating it! I mean I'll keep eating less of course but I had no idea there was something out there that would get me off the ledge that fast on a stressful day. Lovely!

What else. Oh work is weird today. Good thing I'm working out afterwards!

Would you like to see a picture? Well I don't have one today. But I'll try to find something to take a picture of tonight. Just try and hang in there until then. I'm open to suggestions.

Best Weekend Ever.

For real yo. I'm way cranky today because it was just that great that today HAS to totally blow by comparison. We had such a great weekend starting on Friday all the way through last night. Friday we did some serious Guitar Hero 80's jamming at Fred's. Then Gena and Sat showed up and Sat fronched the dog.

Saturday was Jason's b-day so we had a cook-out beach party. It was a blast. Except for Tyler. He almost ruined it with his GD Popsicle antics. Just kidding. Everyone was a pleasure.

Most importantly Jason had a blast. Just watching him play washers and grill hot dogs and throw the Frisbee made my summer. That boy loves a beach cook-out more than anyone I've ever had the luck to know. He was getting ready before we left and he said "I think today calls for my World's Greatest Grandpa t-shirt!" It actually says "This Is What A Great Grandpa Looks Like" and it's MY shirt but it was his birthday so I silently decided he could just have it. Then he couldn't decide between his signature railroad hat or his new Cubs hat. I reminded him that the railroad hat was, indeed, his signature and he agreed that was the best choice.

He slays me.

Anyway, here are some pics Gena took at the party. They are better than my cell phone pics so I'm stealing them.

Here is the birthday boy looking at some corn so good it might make him cry. I swear he was smiling like a goofball right before this, because that is NOT what a great grandpa looks like.

Fred & Sat. It appears Sat is asking for more corn. Fred appears to be rejecting his request.

Tyler & Fred. Fred only makes trades with others who are wearing striped shirts.


Gena & Sat are the only smarty pants that thought to bring an umbrella. Show offs.

Then yesterday Jason and I stayed home all day and I cleaned the living hell out of my apt. It felt so good. I even washed rugs. I realize normal people do this all the time but for me it was a great accomplishment. Then we got cleaned up and went to a SUPER delicious bistro and ate super delicious food. Then we came home and enjoyed our clean new apartment and went to sleep.

Now I'm mad because of work. And because I'm a damn whippet again. That is a test to see if you really read my blog every day or not. If you do then you know how much I hate being a whippit.

Baby...Can't We Give It One More Try?

That's what my vacation pictures just asked me. They also bought me flowers (a lilly and some lilacs..how did they know??) and a box of noodles with cheese on them. How could I resist?

Okay. One last try pictures. But we are on THIN ice lovah.

Here is me at the Ritz Carlton Eno drinking wine. My teeth look a little "i vant to suck your blahhd" but other than that I am actually pleased with this picture of me for once.

Here is Jason taking a picture of the sunset with our real camera on our last night. I love this picture of him for some reason. He just looks handsome and serene.

Here is my daily view at the pool bar. Those are my toes. They matched my swimming suit. There was an adult pool and kids pool. The only difference I could tell was that there weren't horrible spoiled screaming children in the adult pool and there was a bar and a cute pool boy and free towels....other than that they were exactly the same.

And finally this is the view of the ocean from our resort. I usually spent half the day at the pool and then when Jason would get done at 3:00 we would head down to the sea and swim. I lost my sun glasses in an undertow one day but it was worth it because it made me laugh so hard I almost drowned. hahahahah...sigh....good times.

I should have some better pics from my REAL camera soon but for now this will help you feel as if I brought you along under the plane in our kitty carrier...don't worry....we tranquilized you.

Love,

Crescent

Pesto Chango!

I just dumped an entire dish of pesto veggie dip on our cubicle floor. Now it smells. Like pesto. Everywhere. It feels like it's in my nose forever. AND the reason the dish was full because I hated it and was going to throw it away. I threw it away alright.....up up and away.

It's because I'm dressed up. I hardly ever wear anything except jeans and t-shirts to work but today I felt like I should wear a damn skirt for once. That'll teach me. The universe can tell when I'm out of my element and makes sure to heap on an extra helping of putzfrites and spazioli on my motor skills.

I don't know what the hell is up with my pictures not posting here but my compy has been crappy all week so who knows. They aren't even very great pictures anyway. Just some sunsets and shots of me drinking wine. Nothing we haven't all seen a million times before.

What else. OH so Jason and I joined the local YMCA! We did a hand shake eye contact pact (those are legally binding in our marriage) that we were going to get into shape together. It's a relief actually. I needed a buddy but not a girl buddy. I am too insecure to compete with my own gender. Jason and I are both fond of some light, good natured chop busting so I think this will work out (ha!) well but without ending in hurt feelings and divorce. I'm going swimming tonight for the first time (at the Y. I've swam before people. I was almost world champion of swimming and water ballet at a very young age.....don't bother looking that up.....the records were lost at sea).

Here is a picture of Fred's boy feet in my girl shoes. Shoe Trade is one of our favorite games of all time. We've been playing it for years.

CRUD! This pic won't work either! Whatever. Just picture boy feet in my sandles. It's funny. I promise.

THERE! I fixed it. Here it is. I'm sure you've been on the edge or your seat praying this all worked out.

I HATE Vacations on the Beach!

Just kidding. We had a magical time and I wish I were back there in our fancy room drinking fancy wine and looking at the fancy ocean right now.

I have a tan for once so that's kind of cool in a pre-cancerous kind of way.

It's starting to itch. Are tans supposed to itch? Mine does. Or maybe that's just work.

Here are few pics.

Oh swell. It's not letting me add more pictures. What is that about? I'll fix YOU blog!!!!
Fix you good!

GD~!!!!! Something is wrong with my compy. Stay tuned for pics tomorrow.

Beach Beach Beach Beach

That's all I can think of. We leave tomorrow afternoon. AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! That's all I can say. I'm just so looking forward to tanning my fat areas to make them look thinner. I kid, I kid. "If you can't lose it, tan it." Hahahahha. Some lady at work told me they used to say that in the 80's a lot. I don't know if that's true but it cracks me up. Sadly since I am so fair skinned and prone to ER worthy sunburns I am going armed with two bottles of sunblock.

All I have left to do is pack, which should be colorful since I'm taking pretty much every clothing item I have just in case.

We have our company summer party today starting at noon so my vacation officially begins then. It's whirlyball again. Sooo much fun but I've got to be careful. Jason will kill me if I'm on crutches for this vacation.

Yur A Peein' Zombies!!!

This is a short nightmare post. I dreamed that I was sitting on my couch working on some writing (yeah right) and I heard a water running noise coming from the other room. I went in there and a freakishly tall zombie was peeing BLOOD on my wall!!!!!! What do you say about THAT??? BUT it turns out that some big publisher or something saw it happening and realized it was in my dream and said he would pay me "upwards of 1 million dollars" for the idea. I don't think I really know what upwards means in that context but I pretended I did.

I've been reading a bunch of stuff on Italian horror movies even though I will NEVER EVER see any of them because of the gore, but for some reason I like to read up on stuff like that. Movie reviews and all that. Anyway, I'm sure that's why I had that dream. I woke up to every hair on my head standing up though, I'll tell you that much.


PS - This is a day of wonder and magic. I just realized that this is the first post I've ever had an error free spell check run on. Usually I have upwards of about 50 mispellings before I post but not today!

I Shoot, I Score.

About a year or so ago I dropped a cashew down my cleavage and told EVERYONE because I thought it was so funny. Well it's not so funny anymore. Today I dropped one in there for the sixth time in about 5 months and said aloud to myself "OH for GOD'S SAKE Crescent!" (I sounded just like my mother too by the way, she said those words a lot as you can imagine).

Seriously though, that seems excessive. I don't drop any other nuts or berries or food stuffs down there. Just cashews. And as I eat them I can almost FEEL it happen before it does and it's like some crazy nuthin but net shot every time. Whoosh....right down the middle without even hitting the sides. Then I have to dig around in there and shake my shirt while hunched under my desk, hiding my nutty shame. The ironic thing is I can't make a basket, putt a golf ball into a hole, shoot pool or really make ANY kind of item in target EVER! But apparently I'm the Michael Jordan of cashew cleavage ball.

I'm A Damn Whippet.

I don't even get this but I do know I'm way behind on the game. I guess you guys can go in and answer questions about me and my daemon thing might change. Help me be a tiger or something cool, please. I don't wanna be a whippet. *sniff*

Happy Birthday Matt!!!

So glad we got to have such a fun night! I have amazing friends and you are certainly one of the best. This video is for you.....and eventually Elizabeth too!

I get to go HERE!!!!

Good Lord. I can hardly keep my head on straight. So, Jason has been invited to this majestic resort in Laguna, CA (winks at Hixx....you know how extra excited I am, don't you dollface). He's going to be doing some training for a wine bar at this hotel and they are paying for BOTH of us to come out there for FOUR days!!!!!!!!! We have never been on a vacation together besides our honeymoon in Door County, WI (which was lovely, don't get me wrong) so this is truly the coolest news ever. We are both losing our minds with excitment. My plan between now and then is to stop eating and try to tan my Powder white legs. Oh and I need a swimming suit. And a couple sun dresses. And some shoes.

I am the luckiest girl in the land!!!

Ambrosssssiaaaahhhhh

I don't know how this whole business started but this is today's office flashback video winner. Eva's pick. Try not to groove and jam. I am thinking of changing my middle name to 70's soft rock. Legally. It just feels oh so right.





I'll tell you what, David Pack has some flipping PIPES on him! He sings about "a wife" and what not but this album cover might tell a different story. Or maybe the bass player just had a few shooters before this photo shoot. I get huggy after shooters too.

I bet all their hair smells like Agree Shampoo. Sighhh.

Make a wish baby....

Hot Tub Party Funtime Weekend!!

Jason and I spent the weekend in Madison at my oldest sister's house and enjoyed their new hot tub. It was the best. Here is the view from said hot tub if you put your head back.

Plus it was just a really wonderful visit with my sisters and brother in law and nephew and parents and Jason. It's been a long time since he's been able to join me on a weekend trip. I told him how glad I was to have him there because when I go by myself I have a great time, but am always a little homesick for him. My dad gave him his old GPS system for the car so we took an "alternate route" home. It took us through old timey Stoughton, WI so Jason found a radio station that was playing music from the 30's. It was hilarious.

Speaking of being homesick for Jason, I leave tomorrow at the butt-crack of dawn for NYC for work. I'll be there for four days so I'll miss J and the cats but at least I'll have Eva with me. We are both really excited to enjoy that city. I have been there a bunch but always get super excited stomach when I get to go back.

Before I "start spreading the news" I have two more pics from the weekend to hold you over until I get back.

This is Smokey (my sister's cat)squishing out of a laundry basket.

We picked Fred up on our way back into the city and we all went for lunch. We challenged Fred to create a gourmet looking plate with his dips and pita. Not bad for a first try! He was allowed to use anything on the table. The vinegar on the tomato didn't turn out how he'd hoped but none the less...pretty gourmet. Or almost.

He calls this piece "The Perfect Bite".

All You Can Eat Shrimp Saves the Day!

Jason had an off day yesterday too so we decided to go eat at Glen's Diner on Montrose. We get there and it's ALL YOU CAN EAT PEEL AND EAT SHRIMP DAY!!!! It turned it around for us. We started having the best time ever. Laughing hysterically at pretty much everything. Eating plate after plate of garlic shrimp and then finally made the brave decision to try the spicy Cajun shrimp. I had about two before it felt like my lips were going to fry off. But Jason persevered and truly ate all he could eat.

Here he is with his FingerBowl brand wet wipes and a mouth on fire. I told him to make a spicy face.

THAT LOOKS VERY SPICY!!!!!

And here is our table looking like war torn Kosovo at the end of the meal.

THAT'S A VERY MESSY TABLE!!!

My point is we had a really fun night and sometimes that's all you need to get out of a funk. At least it works for Jason and me.

Oh and I ended up having SO much fun that I left my purse on the chair and didn't realize it until I was trying to head out to work this morning. I had to work from home until they opened up at 11 this morning. But it was a nice little turn of events because I had the most relaxing morning and a nice walk and an empty air conditioned train ride into work....I really can't complain. THERE's something new!!! Ahhh...I think that means my whiny week has come to a close and I'm back to my normal "life is good" self.

Have a great weekend!!!

Pobresita.

I don't know if it was that special on the Mayan doomsday calendar that I watched the other night (FYI we are all done for December of 2012 so....you know get your affairs in order and stuff) or if it's really early PMS but I am just so.....ugh or blah or wahhhh or something. Feeling sorry for myself about nothing which annoys the piss out of me. I hate that quality in others and hate it even more when it sneaks up on me about twice a year. Everything is great and fine and good but something is just off inside me this week. I think the main issue is that I have no idea how to be what I want to be. Or maybe I'm not sure what that is yet or something. I want to write but I also want enough money to get a couch and some rugs. These seem like small things but they are indicative of bigger struggles inside I think. I kind of just don't want to be an assistant anymore. But I'm really good at it so here I sit...broken hearted...came to be a famous blogger but only farted. hahahahaha.....that kind of just cheered me up. Fart jokes...is there ANYTHING they CAN'T do?

My good friend and co-worker, Eva, has been in the same boat kind of this week so that's actually been a great help. Yesterday one of the printers was beeping over and over and over and we had this exchange:

Eva - "Hey Guy, you're a doctor, right?"
Me (aka Guy) - "Not certified but yes. What's up?"
Eva - "Is there a disorder or illness that makes you want to kill someone when you hear repetitive loud noises?.....Or is that just mild depression?"

It cracked me up for a good hour. We decided it was the latter.

BUT I had a great time last night at Jason's softball game and have nothing to do tonight except relax and drink some wine on the porch so I'll snap out of it.

AND the guy next to me has the funniest sneeze ever. It sounds so angry. It rules.

PLUS it's Retro Music Video Thursday in my dept. and I won! The objective is to blow each other's minds with an old video from our childhoods. Here was my pick, which was just announced as the winner!



Here was the runner up which is also pretty rad:



and the bronze goes to:




All delightful memories. Okay I feel a lot better now.

8 things.

I hate mememememe's or whatever they are called. The name itself makes me feel car sick. But I'm also in a crappy mood so I'm extra negativo today.

Okay so Biddle asked me to do this meme and he is a friend so I'll comply.

8 things about your childhood that people don't know or something.

1. I never sucked my thumb or used a pacifier.
2. I cried whenever my Dad would talk about his travels because I pictured him alone and it bothered me. He was fine with it but one mention of him eating dinner and I would say..."Who did you have dinner with?" and he'd say "Nobody" and then I'd bawl my head off and they'd have to explain to me that he wasn't lonely on those trips. It made me mad at his job.
3. I was in a local runway show for O'shkoshbygosh which ended up being my first leg shave day as well.
4. I think I hold the national record for most goose eggs on my head in one season. I could list them all but I'm not going to. Just know they all were from me thinking I could do something I could not do. Result....giant goose egg.
5. I started up a protection service where I would walk home the smaller boys that had bully problems. I was bigger so the bullies left me alone and the wee boys got home safely. I did this free of charge but a lot of the guys would give me homemade cards or donuts as thanks.
6. The first time I tried a shrimp cocktail all the shrimp were totally uncooked but I didn't know they weren't supposed to be gray and didn't want to bother anyone so I ate two before anyone at the table noticed. They sent it back and I tried again that same night with cooked shrimp and have loved them ever since.
7. I drank half a bottle of Joy dish washing soap once. Nothing really happened except I got in a little trouble. And maybe my insides were streak free and spotless.
8. I had a giant birthday party for my favorite stuffed bear, Oliver, every fall when the first really windy day happened (that was how I knew it was his b-day for some weird reason). Like the kind where the wind actually howls. My parents let me take over the living room on those days and take the couches and chair cushions to make the party room.

Okay now I have to "tag" 8 people.
I tag:
Howard Jones
Whitney Houston
That's So Raven
Totaro
the entire 79 Chicago Cubs (counts as one)
that annoying girl from the Welch's commercials
Shakira
the cycles from CHiPs

PROOF!

I am not sure I've ever EVER taken such a bad picture but I was very very excited. Tracey the cat looks great though. In spite of her illness she's very photogenic. God. I can hardly even look at this picture....I look so very...special. I always flip my lid over celebs but Party of Five was like my everything during college and Bailey was my main man. PLUS after this picture was taken we all went out and he and his wife are so sweet and real and smart and great. I know I've said that already but, again, I'm a little excitable ever since that trip.

man. I'm obsessing about the badness again. The thing that really blows is the fact that I looked super cute that night and had just discovered via a friend's scale that I've lost 15 lbs. BUT I was all freaked out and it was freezing in L.A. so I had to wear my gross sweatshirt over my cute shirt and if I just had remembered how giant my face looks when I smile that big I would've held back a little.....dammit. I am reverse vain or something. I'll try and let it go in 3......2.....1. Done.

Have a good weekend little ones!

Auto-mo-beeel?????

That's right. We got a car. How adult are we? Very is the answer. Very adult.

So my jet setting May is finally done and I get a few weeks of recovery to prepare for the big NYC trip at the end of June. I'll do a quick re-cap.

Philly - Thought I would be bored but I loved it! Beautiful buildings, nice people, delicious beer. This is the only picture I think I have of Philly sadly. Oh no wait! I have more. Please hold (Rainy Days and Mondays Muzak version plays)......okay found them!

So this is a cool old graveyard.

This is my favorite Philly pic. It's a cool bunch of buildings in the South Street hood.

Okay on to Dallas.

Dallas was the friendliest but hardest to get around and hardest to find a sundries stores ala CVS/Walgreen's/Target.

The Book Depository was for sure the high light. That and a bar called Lee Harvey's. I don't feel like uploading those pictures. It was fun though.

L.A.! Loved it but never need to live there unless I'm crazy rich.

The highlights were seeing my BFF, Andrea and meeting her co-stars from the play she's in. Fat Pig was the play and it was wonderful. Scott Wolf was in it and we hung out all night! He AND his wife (from the New Orleans Real World) and Chris Pine (Just My Luck/Smokin Aces) and the rest of the crowd were all so smart and sweet and fun. I had the time of my life. And so did Tracey the cat. I'm thinking about starting a blog just for her but you can see some of her pics here.

Oh great. My pictures aren't posting all of a sudden. Now you don't believe me do you. I will try again later. But I swears I met Scott Wolf. Ask him.

Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes

So today is Jason's last day at his current job. The hours were insane and we never saw each other and all of a sudden a new oppotunity and career path opened up to him so he took it. He's nervous and we still need to get a car (it's a wine sales job so a car is a must) BUT I think he's excited too even if he won't admit it.

Selfishly I'm excited because I get to have him around again during the week AND on weekends!!! I can't remember the last time we had our weekends off together.

He has 13 days off starting tomorrow. I'll be missing a lot of those due to my crazy jet setting life style this month but it's going to be so cool to come back from L.A. and have him HOME on a Saturday night!

This post is kind of boring but I just wanted to say way to go Jason on trying something new and knowing when something old isn't working. Change is always weird and nerve wracking but mostly it's exciting and new. Like the Love Boat. (hahahah I typed "Love Bat" the first time....ahahah...now THAT would be some good television)

*That picture is of Jason in his work clothes trying to get in a quick song or two on Guitar Hero. His cab was literally waiting outside when I took the pic.*

I'm it.

I think this is called a meme which I say like this: meah meah. Anyway I have to do it.

A. Available or Single? No. That question is confused and I'm married.

B. Best Friend? Jason and Freddy and the Katzfey's

C. Cake or Pie? I don't really like either. I know I know I just don't. I like angel food cake every now and then. but not that much.

D. Drink of Choice? iced tea or chardonnay

E. Essential Item? Tide Stain Sticks and my insurance card

F. Favorite Color? Orange

G. Gummi Bears or Worms? Worms.

H. Hometown? Stevens Point, Wisconsin

I. Indulgence? everything

J. January or February? February just because it's closer to spring

K. Kids? not yet but I want one soonish!

L. Life is incomplete without - hysterical laughing

M. Marriage Date? Jason was my date to my marriage.

N. Number of siblings? 2 older sisters

O. Oranges or apples? Oranges because they smell awesome

P. Phobias/Fears? frogs and toads. *SHIVER!!!*

Q. Favorite quote? "Waiter! That mustachioed gentleman is eating my soup!" Jason said that out of the blue to no one in particular the other morning and now it's our new favorite quote because it makes no sense in any universe.

R. Reasons to smile? Guitar Hero and Jason and seeing my family this weekend and my sister's new hot tub and I get to leave at 11 today and have Monday off!

S. Season? I love them all but fall is my favorite

T. Tag Three. TAG - Let's play four square instead

U. Unknown fact about me - I have to hold a piece of my hair to fall asleep. I mean while it's still on my head. It's not like I have a bag of hair that I cuddle with.

V. Vegetarian or Oppressor of Animals? recovered vegetarian

W. Worst habits - relaxing too much

X. X Rays or Ultrasound? I've had tons of both. I glow in the dark.

Y. Your Favorite Food- spaghetti...I miss the days of eating giant bowls of noodles....sigh.

Z. Zodiac- Libra

Now that THAT'S over with I think my favorite moment of the spring happened last night. Jason and I had Matt and King over for some Guitar Hero and while I was jamming on a song I'd never heard of King said to Jason "Crescent is really good at Guitar Hero. I was not expecting that."

Olivia Newton-John and I talked last night....

in my dreams! Literally in my dreams, not like "yeah...in your DREAMS Crescent you liar!!!". We've been a little obsessed with her lately at work after three of us in my dept. discovered we were all die hard fans of hers as children. Joe said that he spent a majority of his youth convinced that he and O.N.J. would someday be wed. Eva went through a very long and serious head band phase after seeing the Physical video and I used to force my mom to call me Sandy OR Olivia while I paraded around the house in a short sleeved black leotard that I would alternate the sleeve position on to indicate whether I was "good Sandy" or "bad Sandy". Every time I lowered the shoulders down a few inches I would announce the arrival of Bad Sandy by yelling "Tell me about it....STUD!".

Anyway, we've been listening to (and singing) Make a Move On Me and Magic via YouTube over and over and over. It keeps us sane and drives our non-fan co-workers into early departures and extra coffee breaks.

So, last night, I dreamed that I got to have a nice little sit down with a Xanadu era Ms. Newton-J. She was all fadey and soft looking like when they put Vaseline on lenses to make the elderly women on Dynasty look like 20 year olds.

I started the convo with "You know I recently watched Grease again and that was actually a really sucky movie." She agreed. Don't get me wrong...that was DREAM me. REAL me thinks Grease is NON-sucky and kept me company during my single digit years.

I don't remember much else except that she was really nice and seemed to like me even though I dogged on Grease. I do remember having the "talk" about the sad decline into stupidity that is John Travolta and how I loved him as much as I loved her until he decided to love on Zenu....or Xenu...whatever that fake alien thing is that L. Ron talked people into paying for or something.

My point of this post is this. I have also been experiencing some light to moderate baby fever these days and started going through my baby name list that I've known for years. My number one girl name is Olivia. Funny thing is, until this Newton-John resurrection this past month I didn't even put it together that I probably love that name because of her.

Typical.

In conclusion, here is a video I wish I'd made. It actually made me tear up a little. Again, I say, typical.

You Otter Watch This.

this, for some reason, restores my faith in the world. Not that I didn't have any before but man...it's just sooooooooo precious!!! I can't take it.

FLOSS FIGHT!

Jason and I and some friends were out getting overserved last Thursday night. We were walking from bowling to some bar or another when Jason and I decided to have a chase, throw things, kick fight. I was laughing too hard for most of it to be any kind of worthy foe to him, but I did get to utilize the entire box of dental floss that was in my bag. It was quite beautiful actually. Kind of like ribbon dancing only smaller. I forgot all about it until I was walking down Lincoln on Saturday and saw the carnage of our floss war.

I love notes.

This is a pic of my notes collection. It's more of a triad than a collection but it's going to grow into something magical, I just know it. My co-worker Joe always wants to go for coffee towards the end of the day so a group of us usually make a Starbucks run around 3:00. One day we totally spaced and forgot to tell him. When I got back to my desk there was a note on my chair that said "You went to Starbucks? I'm hurt. Sadly (then sadly is crossed out), Sadly, Joe." It's become our favorite joke over in my area. At least once a day one of us says..."Sadly....(then we make a cross out noise) Sadly, Joe." It's so not funny to the outside world but man it kills me still.

So then yesterday I sent Joe some pictures I had taken of a booth layout at a tradeshow for some graphics stuff he's doing and the photos were horrible due to my crap camera (Jason found it in a cab 3 years ago so what do I expect?). Joe was laughing hystercially and I told him not to hurt my feelings (jokingly) then I went for coffee without him. When I got back a napkin was on my chair "Crescent, I'm sorry about my photo comments. Sorry, (crossed out) Sorry, Joe."

I love office antics and private jokes. Even though I just made this one sort of public.

PS - The yellow note says "I am the last can standing". It was on a can of LaCroix water a few months ago and it cracked me up. I have a weak constitution for puns and word play.

camera phone.

I'm super crazy busy at work these days but here are some pics to hold you over. You being Matt. Hi Matt!
Here's me with my Hot Fuzz advance screening ticket. That movie was one of the funniest I've seen EVER! Take THAT!

Fred and Douglas. Making their Mii faces.

my messy cube at work and what looks like a floaaaaating basket!!!!! I've cleaned since then.

crap. time for more work. more pics tomorrow maybe.

Love,

c

weird.

Margaret has tagged me to tell six weird things about myself. This is my first game of blog tag and I'm going to try and get it right. It's hard keeping up with this bougey blogging society. Bunch of fancy weirdos.

Anyway:

1. I hate shopping and trying on clothes and avoid it at all costs but I do like having new things. So I impulse buy a lot to get it over with.

2. I love escargot and mussels but get very easily grossed out by chicken. I'll eat it but it better be almost burnt or I get the gags.

3. I have to really talk myself out of feeling emotion about inanimate objects. Like I just got a new cell phone and I ALMOST got teary eyed about taking the SIM card out of the old one. I cry when I sell cars too. I swear I'm not insane I just associate times and people and places with objects sometimes and can't let go. Okay, maybe I spoke too soon on that insane thing.

4. I kinda like the smell of skunk (not on me but in the air), gas (see previous parenthetical comment) and cow manure (again....not on..in air).

5. I've never camped.

6. My third memory is of drinking Lemon Joy out of a bottle in front the sink.

PS - I have some very exciting news. Oh wait...I already told it in item 3. I got a new phone. but guess what...it has a caaaammmmera!!!! This blog is about to come with more pictures! Bad ones, but still. Probably mostly of my cats or bars.

Here's one to get you started.

My adorable tabby Calaban (I call him Calafat, but it doesn't hurt his feelings I swear). Ugh. That pillow looks way dirtier than it is. Still...I need new sheets. Although that blanket rules. One of my best friends made it and on the other side it's supposed to have the word "meow" all over it because I like hearts and cats, but she attached it backwards so the other side says "woem" all over it. We love it.

Well, we were just another band out of Boston....

Brad Delp, the lead singer of Boston died this weekend. One of my favorite bloggers, Crabbydad, wrote a great entry about this today http://crabbydad.blogspot.com/2007/03/guess-he-looked-back.html. The entry coupled with the video and song at the end actually made me teary eyed.

My oldest sister is ten years older than me so I grew up listening to Boston, Journey, Forigner, Eddie Money, etc. when all the other kids were listening to Disney albums because they were 5 years old. My sisters wouldn't have that though. I got to spend most of my summer days with them since we were all off school listening to their music and I loved every minute of it. (another great song). I suppose to them it was babysitting, in fact I'm sure it was, but to me it was the coolest thing ever. We would "lay out" on sunny days and Jacy would set up the reflector matt and we'd use baby oil on our skin and lemon juice in our hair. Healthy. I would lay there and listen to them sing along with the radio and mimic their every move. They added more lemon juice then I added more lemon juice. They turned over, I turned over. They said a song "totally made them feel sad" and I would cry too.

Even better than lay out days were rainy/thunderstorm days. That was when we would wash our hair in the spilloff from the gutter. It sounds weird and gross but it was the best. We would put on our swimming suits and take turns washing and conditioning with Agree shampoo. Wow. Agree....that takes me back too. Anyway, then we would dry off and come inside and watch t.v. for the rest of day or every now and then they would dress me up and put tons of make up on me just for fun. I loved those days. They feel so faint now most of the time since I'm 32 today and I was 5 then. But the one thing that brings them back the hardest and fastest is music. Boston is one of those bands.

I suppose now is the time that these old rockers are going to start dropping off the sphere more and more now that I'm older, but it won't feel less sad I don't think. It's not like I knew the guy.....it's just that his songs and voice were a wonderful resonant part of my childhood and first introductions to music and how much I loved it.

So I'm going to copy Crabbydad now and post a video that takes me back to those times. It's a little closer to my teen years but still one of my favorites. For years my "play name" was Amanda just so I could pretend this song was about me. And yes I did that with Beth by Kiss as well.

Fall Has Fell!

Oh my god this weather is making me INSANE! I just went outside for about 5 mins and considered not coming back to work. Alas, I was sick this week so I had to. Boring. This is a boring post. (robo voice)

Well I will say this. I am 99% sure that I appreciate nice weather more than anyone.

AND we got our bonus checks today. I'm trying to resist the urge to go online and buy everything ever made. I AM going to hit Anne Taylor Loft after this birthday cake thing in the conf. room and am going to get a shirt that fits. The sweater I'm wearing is molting and too short.

AND I think this week will be the week Jason and I finally get a real life bed! Our futon days are almost over. I hope we don't grow apart from each other due to all the extra room we'll have at night! I doubt it. We'll probably still sleep right in the middle with the two cats at our respective sides but at least we'll be doing it on an actual matress. I predict less insomnia for me and earlier bed times for Jason.

AND....I should be writing a City Guide on Milwaukee right now but I ain't. That's right. I AIN'T!

Love and balmy temps,
Crescent

It's My Turn....Though I Don't Have All The Answers....

Sigh. I need to purchase Mahogany. That movie really does it for me. Or at least the soundtrack.

So today feels oddly important to me. First off, it's the last night of Impress These Apes and even though I'm probably going to remain in last place I have learned so much and really have had a fun time. I needed to get back on stage a little. It fills something up inside me that normally is empty.

I'm going into tonight relaxed and happy with my final act. It will be a good night I think.

Also, I just had my annual review and talked very openly with my boss about moving forward as a writer here. He was so supportive and really shook off some of my hesitation about just diving in and moving forward.

AND I've finally started my exercise routine again and have lost 4 more lbs. I'm ready to kick that in the ass too. I'm not going into this summer feeling horrible about myself. No way. I'm done with that.

All of these things together and separate have created this perfect storm of motivation and confidence that I really haven't ever had. I tend to be a little too meek and mild for my own good when it comes to changing my life. I'll do it, but the no guarantee thing always makes me nervous in the service. But honestly...I feel like I'm outgrowing that need for certainty. I think I'm ready to just get stuff done and not hold myself back so much.

This very well may be the lamest post ever. Sorry. I just needed to get that all out somewhere.

Kittens,
Crescent

Happy Valentine's Day Jason!

(this picture is from two Christmas's ago at my parents when Jason put on all his gifts at once and my mom still talks about how funny that was to her.)

Happy Valentine's Day to my husbo, Jason. What a crazy time we've had so far. You make me laugh harder than anyone ever has and even though I sometimes say I don't like it when you say my name over and over and over and over and over....I secretly do. Plus, I meant it when I said you have the same butt since college.

(singing R&B style) You are my everything....you mean the world to me.....you're the only thing that matters.....matters to me....OH baby baby baby bayyybayyy.....

(end singing)

I love you so so soooo much dude,

Crescent Tay

Snowbody Knows....

You know...it's not the snow of a blizzard that is the issue...it's the drifting. I love snow storms, but only if I can home and warm and dry. As it stands I'm at work and chilled and my pant legs are wet.

BUT no one is here but my favorite co-workers so we are enjoying our warm office and having kind of a fun work day.

I hate this blog entry right now. I'm trying to force myself to say something here because it's been so long since I updated it but I'm dry. ('cept for my pant legs)

OH! Here's a small something.

I had a dream last night that someone broke my wrist on purpose. It was so real and awful and hurt so much. THEN later in that dream I was marrying my old college boyfriend (yarg! (that's not his name...that's the feeling he gives me)). Anyway, he was nicer in the dream but was trying to get me to be more responsible. We had lots of money in the dream so I wasn't working and just sat around most of the time. As he was lecturing me he was taking me around the house and itemizing everything that I'd bought....furniture, electronics, candles and stuff. Then he realized that everything was from the library! Everything had that library card and stamp thing that shows it's checked out. I opened my shirt and it was on my stomach too! I was from the library! What the hell does that mean?????

I'll ask my mom. Maybe I'm just feeling a little checked out these days or something although I don't think I am actually. I'm doing a lot and feeling pretty ambitious. So who knows.

I think it would be sooo funny if I did have an ex-boyfriend named Yarg. I would tell everyone and we would laugh.

Sleep Numbers

Jason got home really late from work last night and came right to bed. The conversations we have as we are falling asleep are so funny to me and some of my favorite moments of my day.
Last night went like this:

Jason: Dude...I had a really great time with you the past two nights (his nights off of work).
Me: Me too dude...it was lovely.
Jason: I'm scared I'm not tired. I need Mr. Monster in here. (that's what he calls one of our cats) Oh Mr. MONSTER.....Come in here dude......(cat comes in and of course sits on MY shoulder with his butt towards my face and his tail hitting me in the mouth every two seconds.)
Me: Jason...this isn't comfortable.
Jason: But he loves you! Listen to how hard he's purring!
(I roll over and the cat leaves)
Jason: Way to go!
Me: I'm sorry but my back gets sore sleeping on this stupid futon enough without an 800 pound cat on me too.
Jason: My sleep number is four. (except he likes to say that word "fewor" for some reason. it cracks him up.)
Me: We don't have sleep numbers J.
Jason: My sleep number is feworty fewor.
Me: If we ever end up on a game show where they seperate us and then ask what the other person's favorite number is we will totally win because I KNOW yours with be 44.
Jason: Or fewor.
Me: We'd better decide now.
Jason: Just fewor I think. What is your favorite number?
Me: Eight.
Jason: WHAT???! No way.
Me: Yes..that is my favorite number.
Jason: I know why.
Me: Why?
Jason: Because it goes around and around and around and around.
Me: That's right. And 3 is my second favorite number because it's half of that.

silence.

Jason: I don't even know you anymewor.

I Was RIGHT!

My theory....it was...it was....SPOT ON! I'm in shock that I was right about something for once.
So last night, three of my dearest friends came over and helped me and Jason FINALLY get our new apartment cleaned and organized and even.....brace yourself...decorated! It looks soooo great! I've actually never lived in such a great looking place unless you count my parents house which is REALLY great looking.

Anyway, I was dreading it and it ended up being a fun time! Jason played some great CD's and we sang and drank good wine and ate good pizza. All the while whipping that pad into some serious shape. I meant to take pictures but I think I went blind from glee.

I am now running on almost empty since I couldn't sleep the night before last due to my basic insomnia and worry over getting the apartment done and then I couldn't sleep last night because I was so excited.

I feel like a new person today. I can't wait to go home tonight and watch Angel, Season 2 in my clean and cozy home!

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH....i'm still a little wound up.

I'm A Great Date.

So last night was Jason's first night off in a loooong time and we decided to go have a nice dinner at Fiddlehead Cafe (go eat there..it's great). Well everything was fine until I said SOMETHING that made my own self cry and I couldn't stop. What the hell is THAT about? It's not hormones...it's not life...life is good! I just am so sensitive lately. I hate it. My theory, for now, is that it's because my apartment is a mess from the move still and since my friends are coming over tonight to help me clean it up for a baby shower I'm throwing on Saturday I feel like maybe that will help? Maybe? Is that what this is? Or is it just winter?

The only way I can explain it is that I feel like an ass a lot lately or like I'm embarrassed more than normal or something. And not funny, wacky Crescent embarrassed, but the kind that makes you feel like a huge tool the next day and gives you a stomach ache. I'm just kind of down on myself in general.

I told two of my best friends about last night via text and they both said pretty much the same thing.

Text from Fred: You're bottling shit up again, Guy. (he calls me guy)
Text from Anne: Oh sweetie....I'm not surprised with all you've been holding in.

So I ask myself, "Self? Why can everyone else see when you are in need of a release of my emotional toxins but I can NEVER feel it coming myself? Self?? Answer me!!!" Alas I have no answer. I guess it's just the way that I am and that's okay really. I figure if I have a weird, really poorly timed sob fest once every half a year or so I'm doing pretty well.

It just frustrates me to be living such a great life and still get upset like that sometimes. That seems selfish and weird but I suppose it's just the way it goes.

Oh, and the crying happened between the risotto and the sturgeon and was all wrapped up by the time we got home. So date night wasn't a total wash by any means. I'm just still embarrassed. Poor Jason didn't know what to do. Ugh. I sooo need to invest in a time machine or something. I hate reflecting sometimes.

Darn it.

I had a great dream to tell you about and I thought about it the whole train ride to work along with another important nugget of wisdom that occurred to me...but guess what? All gone. Zapped from my pea brain because the first hour and half of work was like some sort of whirlwind of people needing my help. And with that help I've lost all memory of my important and funny things to say.

They will come back to me. I'll smell something or say something or see something or hear something that will trigger me back to the dream, but for now um....well....it's Friday!

and um....I'm going out for a girls night!

and....OH! Jason woke up asking for a piece of licorice this morning. (not a sexy euphemism either...actual licorice.)

I told him we didn't have any right now and he said..."Oh no...."

It was pretty adorable. He's extra cute when he's sleepy. I miss him. BUT starting next week he will actually have TWO whole days off a week so we'll get to hang out more thankfully!

Okay. I will keep trying to remember my other important dream/thoughts and will post them later.

Love,
Crescent

late.

Sorry about the lateness of this post. I've been really sick with a month long cold from hell. I sound like a muppet today, whatever that means.

Anyway, the opening night went well. I remembered all my lyrics and the audience seemed to like it. I didn't score very high but there are 7 more weeks for me to up my points.

You can watch all the vids of everyone's performance from that night here....http://www.blewt.com/apes/.

Also, we got a nice review in The Chicago Reader!

Now if I could just breath maybe I could work more on next week's challenge....stand up comedy. Triple yipes man.

Overture, curtains lights.....

So it's opening night of my show. Impress These Apes. I'm excited and nervous and horse and have new clothes and a new hair cut and can't wait and will be glad when it is done.

Stay tuned tomorrow for the video of my song that I wrote and performed with my egg shakers. Lord help us all.

Gloves & Bugs

This is me on prom night. 1992. I can't believe I wore gloves.

Anyway, I just needed a picture and that one makes me laugh.....and miss big hair and my skinny arms.

Tonight is my best friend, Fred's, 32nd b-day party. We are going to a big divey karaoke bar and are leaving right from work. I wore these great super high awesome black boots that I just bought a few weeks ago, but alas, by noon my feet were screaming for help. So I went to Payless and got some more sensible shoes.

man. blogging every day is hard.

sigh. um.....OH!

I dreamed about a swarm of mosquitoes in my face last night.

Have a great weekend!


it'll be better on Monday. I promise.

PBS & Nacthmares

I wonder if I'll ever do anything worthy of being photographed by Annie Leibovitz. I watched a documentary or biography or biomentary about her last night. It was on PBS and I missed the first 30 minutes or so but got majorly sucked into it fast. It just struck me how amazing portraits are and how they can capture such hidden things about someone OR sometimes how vacant someone is too. I have no examples of what I'm talking about because I'm lazy so, I don't know what more to say except you should watch PBS and try to catch it.

On another note. B sharp. hahahahahahah. Whoa. Right after I made that bad joke my onion bagel turned on me a little. That'll teach me to be a hack.

As I was saying before being so rudely interrupted, I had a hell of a night of dreams last night. All having to do with being stranded on a Lost style island and not being sure if I wanted to get rescued or not. It was one of those dreams that seems to go on for hours and hours and has a major epic feel to it. And it wasn't paradise at all. We were being chased and had to go for food in shifts.......(as I'm typing this please know I DO realize how exactly like the t.v. show Lost this all is).....and there were these numbers....just kidding. Still, I was feeling really conflicted about the impending rescue. I thought about how much I loved all my island mates and worried that once we got back to normal life we'd cease knowing each other. That notion broke my heart in the dream but I also really wanted all these friends to be safe.

Eventually a lasso came out of a helicopter (not sure why the a-hole couldn't just land and let us in but whatever) and pulled us up one by one. AND I was right. We did lose touch and it was never the same.

At the very end of the dream I was living in a cabin in the woods with some co-workers and was trying to get ready for work when the toilet exploded in my face and I was soaked and the floor was flooded. I went outside and said to one of the co-workers...."now I'm all urinated and can't go to work!" and she said "no time for that. a storm is coming." and I looked up towards the forest and the sky was night time black in the distance. It ended with me saying..."uh...I'd SAY a storm is coming alright."

That kind of thing always freaks me out. I don't even know if I believe in future telling but I do believe in t.v. and movies and they would say that was a bad sign dream. I'm going to just take it as a message that some snow is on the way. That makes me feel more at ease.

Resolutions

1. Post something here every weekday because Dan is in need and he is my friend.
2. figure out where this mildew smell is coming from today and I really hope it isn't my top. It just CAN'T be.
3. Work really hard for this show that I'm in to be free and funny and not scared and myself onstage. I think that sounds fun and like it could be really really good for my soul. It just sounds refreshing.
4. Lose 25 lbs by April 1st. Then I can start to get dressed in the morning of that day and start to put on my size extra giant jeans but then say..."April Fools Mr. Giant Jeans!!! You don't fit me anymore because I kept my resolution!" It will be good payback for last year's April Fool's when my jeans broke an empty egg on my head. *shaking fists* Youuuu!!!!
5. Work out on my Gazelle everyday. (the machine not the animal...that would be sick and cruel)

Is that it? I'm sure there's more but I'm a triangle/diagonal/1-3-5 person. So five it is.

I should have number 2 completed by lunchtime when I plan to do some serious investigation.

Happy New Year!

A Very Special Post Just for Matt

Hey Matt. You missed it. Our dept had our holiday party last night at the ice skating rink. I had been bragging for weeks about how I was a pretty great ice skater and how everyone would be wow'd with my grace and skill.

Nope.

First of all they ONLY had hockey skates. I've never skated on those before. THEN it started raining so the ice was extra slippery. THEN they had the nerve to have a free open bar prior to me getting on the rink.

Basically it went like this.

"Come on everyone! Let's skate! I'm so excited!" (slip SLAM on the ice) "Whoa! ahahahaha Wow! These skates will take some getting used to! Here I go again...I'll get it this...." (slip SLAM on the ice) "hahaha...WHOA! Nah..I'm totally fine you guys...don't worry...I just need to get my bar...." (slip SLAM on the ice) (slip SLAM on the ice) (slip SLAM on the ice) (slip SLAM on the ice)

I am black and blue and sore like you would not believe today.

I wish you could've been there. You very well might have laughed yourself to death.

Watch My Audition! (frequently...just do it)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D8Znp6jeqls

Also please know that it pains me to do this because I am flipped out by how awful I look in this video. But it's for a good cause so I will deal. Now watch it. Or at least click it....a lot.

click it,
Crescent

I'm In A Show!!!

I just found out I have been cast in Impress These Apes at the Playground Theater here in Chicago. It's a talent competition of sorts where each week we are assigned a different talent and then scored by a panel of judges. The grand prize is $250! Which I could always use.

Anyway, that's exciting. I almost didn't go to the audition either because it's been sooo long since I've been on stage and I was sooooo nervous. Thankfully my pride took over and I thought of how lame it would be of me to not at least give it a try and it paid off.

Wish me leg breaks! (whoa...not really though...it IS slipping and falling season after all)

Vote for Awkward Rick

This is a local Chicago improv guy that I don't know him but cracks me up. He's a finalist in the Yahoo Talent Show.

Watch here and vote here - http://talentshow.yahoo.com/index;_ylt=Av_CsEtTaURcLm0MkR3Y82Io1tEF#v=102706

I'm not usually a video poster so hopefully this works. Anyway, give this vid your vote. Even if you don't like it. Do it because I tell you to. I mean it. Otherwise there WILL be trouble.

An Epidemic

Today is World AIDS Day. Please take some time to educate yourself and others about this disease. Also remember friends, family and loved ones that have been affected by AIDS and HIV.

Hopefully through education and awareness we can eventually stop this indiscriminate killer and instead spread knowledge and compassion.

http://www.theglobalfund.org/en/

www.lighttounite.org

http://www.charitynavigator.org/index.cfm?bay=search.results&keyword_list=aids&Submit.x=16&Submit.y=12

http://www.amfar.org/cgi-bin/iowa/index.html

http://www.aidsresearch.org/

Sweet Holy Crap.

Moving is truly and officially...un-fun.

I don't have much time...for the kitchen is currently mocking me with more packing that needs to be done.

I just want this moment down in this blog so that when it is all done, which it will be, I can look back at this and feel that freaky kind of happy that only comes with the relief of a move coming to completion.

That's the closest to the brighter side I can get at this moment.

Love,
Packy

I'm thankful for....

...any moving boxes you can spare.

I'm going home tomorrow to see my family and I can't wait, but somewhere in the back of my pea brain all I can hear is...."you are moving next week. you only have a few boxes. you need to scheudule movers. you CAN'T schedule movers because you won't have the cash. you need to call your landlady and ask her for a payment plan. your landlady won't go for that...nooo no can do."

And don't even get me started on my work related evil voice.

BUT I'm going to shake that all off and enjoy my time with my family. Plus they always put everything into hilarious perspective. That is one of about a million things that makes them the best. I am crazy excited to hug and kiss them all and then eat food until I can't breath normally.

Happy Thanksgiving everyone and make sure to tell people that you love them and are greatful for them. This holiday is as good a time as any.

Dreams Dreams the Magical Fruit....

When I was little....about 3-5 really...I had a reoccurring nightmare that my babysitter was actually a wild boar in overalls but no one would believe me. There are deep and dark reasons for this but we won't go there since this is the Brighter Side and all that.

Anyway, last night, for the first time in YEARS I dreamed about a wild boar again! I was riding in a car with family? friends? strangers? I can't remember for the life of me, but what I DO remember is a giant boar jumping through the windshield and landing on me. I was trying not to panic but was flipping my lid. Someone came in and finally pulled him/her off of me and I woke up. Now where in the Sam Hell did THAT dream come from? Moving stress? Repressed something or other? I don't know, but it sure was scary.

I also dreamed a PERFECT cell phone commercial for t.v. It had a theme song and everything. It took place in a life size doll house made of all steel beams and every member of the family was isolated in their rooms talking on their cell phones in angry tones. The song that played through out was called "One Big Happy Family" but was really punky/metally sounding. It was the coolest. I don't know what demographic that dream phone company was aiming for, but I do know that all the angry punk Barbie's and dysfunctional families out there will be on dream board.

Boar....d. See? Never doubt my ability to bring it all back around.

good LORD!

So one more post today. It's a quick one. Just to illustrate my point further.

I just fell off my scale (if I keep it at home I weigh my self too much) at my desk and was mid conversation with a co-worker and simultaneously THREW the phone in the air knocking over my pencil cup and landed on my ass. It made SUCH a ruckus that three other co-workers in the area came running over to see what happened. Just me....falling....off my scale...at work.

Smooth.

The Plunge Into Madness....

Good things are happening in my life. Jason's new job, a possible promotion for me in the works, we move into a much nicer and bigger apt in a couple weeks....ahh...should be feeling a peace. But I'm me, so instead I am having one of my chicken little episodes where the smallest things are stressing me out so badly because things are so great. Does that make sense? No? Well eat it. It's just how I feel.

The thing about it all is that I am bumbly by design. There's just no two ways about it. I am clumsy and bumbly and when stressed this little quirk of mine (I'm gonna let it shine) gets amped up from bumbly to total walking disaster.

All I wanted to do last night was go home, put on tenners, walk to Jewel to cash in our huge jar of change, come home, enjoy a frozen diet dinner and watch my backed up episodes of Jericho. But NOOOOOOOOOooooooo......

(This is the part that my dear friend Matt leans in closer to the computer screen and evilly rubs his hands together in anticipation of the antics I am about to relive through the written word.)

I leave work. Train is running 45 minutes late. Fine. I can deal with that. It DOES throw off my schedule a bit but I'm flexible.

Finally get home around 7:30 walk into the apartment and immediately slip and fall and crack my back on the book shelf. Now slipping on nothing happens to me all the time but THIS time I had slipped in something. It was cat barf. I cleaned up that little gift and then went into the bathroom to pee and I find MORE cat barf. (the barfing cat is fine now just so no one worries....he just has a delicate constitution).

I get the last of the paper towels, t.p. and a sponge and clean it up. I then put a wad of toilet paper in the toilet and flush. All of a sudden OVERFLOW!!! OVERFLOW!!! Toilet water EVERYWHERE....unstoppable, cascading toilet water. I grab all the old towels I can and clean it up. Then I try our crappy Walgreen's plunger. The rubber top breaks off. At this point I stopped and took a deep breath and decided to go get a new plunger and cash in those coins.

In my bumbly frustration I decide to use a garbage bag for the 100 lbs of coinage. I dumped them all into the bag and put THAT bag into my messenger bag. Walking 7 blocks with the extra weight was good exercise but man.....I thought I might die at one point.

Got to Jewel, head to the Coinstar machine...open my bag aaaaaaannnnnd the garbage broke so all my coins started spilling everywhere in the store. I finally got them all into the machine. (the total was $143.02 for those of you who were wondering.)

I buy the LAST plunger they have and a frozen diet dinner and walk back home feeling much more positive about it all.

I'm no slouch when it comes to plumbing, just so you know. I was known for my ability to fix toilets with nothing more than a toothpick and a good attitude back in the day. So I was feeling cocky about my ability to plunge out this clog. I plunged and plunged and then flushed. OVERFLOW!!! again.

Meanwhile two fire trucks and an ambulance have pulled up in front of my building. I'm thinking they were either called after a call from a concerned neighbor who heard my tirade of profanity during the first overflow OR my building is on fire. Luckily it was neither. I think it was a false alarm. But the flashing lights and sirens did not help my stress level.

I STILL have to pee, mind you. My phone wasn't working so I couldn't call anyone for help. I decided to call it a night. I took a shower, skipped my dinner on the off chance that it didn't agree with me on a night when I was toilet-less, and watched two episodes of Jericho.

At least I was better off than those poor post nuclear war survivors. That was comforting.

PS - And yes, we had to pee in the bathtub during the night....which I think Jason actually thought was kind of fun. I did not.

O'Possum, My Possum.....

My brother in law made the pic above after I told him about a possum (opossum..whatever) that was almost literally knocking on our back door the other night. That's not a euphimism either. He was going through some trash out back and that just happens to be right by our bedroom door. I am terrified of possums. Jason always says "they look like ghosts...." which freaks me out even more, which, I'm sure, is why he always says it.

Thankfully we are moving. Soon. In a month. Holy crap. I have a lot to do. I better go.

P.S. The possum in the cage in the picture is one that my brother in law accidentally caught in a live cage in his yard a few months ago. *shiver* It looks like it's saying...."ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh". creepville.

A year later...

Remember a year ago when I blobbed...I mean blogged about losing weight? Well here I am a year later, another birthday past and I haven't really lost much. BUT I finally got some help and joined Weight Watchers. Now this sounds like an ad. Seriously though...it's working really well for me and I'm finally starting to see a couple less chins and jowels which is a load off. Literally.

PS - I could've eaten that whole cake pictured above right then and there. But I didn't. Also, I made a good wish. I hope it comes true.

WHAT?

My job has exploded into about three jobs at once. I love it though. However I'm very busy.

I know...that's no excuse to neglect this here blog. SO quick story.

My right ear has been clogged for a month. Today the doctor was finally able to EARiggate the plug right out. I feel like a new woman and can't tell you how nice it is to have hearing back in that ear.

I made one mistake. I looked into the bowl after the procedure. GAH-ross. I clean my ears everyday, but apparantly some ear hoodlums missed a meeting because that was one disgusting bowl full of ear-ness. *shiver*

I don't know why I did it, but it's done and now I'm stuck with that memory until I stupidly look somewhere grosser sometime.

Great ideas

I've been having some great ideas lately. I can't share them all here lest you steal them and make them your own. (Matt, I'm looking at you....j/k....see you at dinner)

I will say this. One involves a placemat that looks modern and elegant but also contains a fun game for the whole table to enjoy. There is a kids version too. It will make me rich, RICH I tells ya!

I've said too much.

Here is another great idea that a genius friend of mine came up with that I think could possibly revolutionize the coffee world. Check it out and if you dig it then sign up and digg it....dig? The site itself is yet another great idea so you won't regret it.

Check it: http://digg.com/gadgets/Roast_Coffee_At_Home_with_a_Popcorn_Popper

What's a wood crib? About ten pounds.

So the one in front is the wood crib that Jason and I built to hold the logs we split while at his parents. It was easy but I kept cutting my arms on the wires we used to hold them together.

After we were done that day I went inside and checked my email while Jason got cleaned up. I wrote to everyone in my dept. and told them of the wood crib. Chris, one of my very good buddies here wrote back and said, "A wood crib! Who are you planning to put in it? Is there something we should know?"

Well of course he was thinking I meant a baby crib but I misunderstood his email and thought he was making a dead bodies in the woods joke which seemed really dark and out of character for him, but it cracked me up. Like we had to build a wood crib cuz we gone and kilt somebody! It's so creeptown.

When I got back to work I gave him some kudos for the dark joke and he, of course, had no clue what I was talking about. When I explained it he just stared at me and finally said, "So...are you pregnant or not."

Wisco...the recap

I don't really have a ton of time with my new and exciting job duties (some of which include writing! Kick it!!) BUT I want to make sure to get something on here.

I will say that our trip was wonderful. I never had to watch anything die and caught one fish that ate my yellow spinner (not a euphemism for anything) and swam away. My in laws took such good care of us and took us out on the water or hiking to water falls or something fun and new every day.

The time with Jason was, as always, wonderful. The trip up in our super cool PT Cruiser we rented, the time there, the trip home, after getting home....I never get sick of him, I swear. He'll steam my clams at times (a euphemism) but only in that trying to suppress my laughter way that I secretly love. Watching how people interact with their families is the most telling thing ever. He is helpful and sweet to his mom and dad in such a sincere way. Blah blah blah...Jason this and Jason that. He's truly just wonderful company and a stand up cat, but don't tell him I said that, it'll go straight to his head.

SO~ (buttons) here is the important list of animals I saw UP CLOSE while on my trip.

1. deer drinking water by the lakeside
2. one otter
3. one muskrat
4. one giant Northern that I caught but that ate my bait.
5. lots of big fish Jason caught but threw back.
6. Two gaggles or flocks or whatever of wild turkeys! Isn't that nuts?
7. cranes cranes cranes who I am now in love with because the way they walk is the cutest. They look like they are sneaking around.
8. ducks
9. seagulls
10. three eagles!

I hope I haven't forgotten any. I was really hoping to see a bear but no dice. My mother in law called me two days ago and left a message saying a bear had just walked through their front yard! Dang it! I can't believe I missed that.

Tomorrow I will show you pics of the wood we split.