A Key, A Star, A Leaf and A Feather

This is the only superstition I've allowed myself during my cancer run. My, then, 17 year old nephew gave me this bracelet when he came to visit me the week before my lumpectomy. He did NOT want to hear or talk about the cancer. It made him visibly sick and worried. But he showed up with this in a little gift bag with a candle and it spoke volumes. He said it was "a house warming gift" but I'd lived in that apartment for about five years at the time.

I wore it to every test, surgery, lab, x-ray, mammo, chemo and radiation treatment. It used to be all silver and the feather was blue and the star was white but it's all rubbed off. I like it that way. Shows the wear and tear of the journey.

I have another mammogram today and I almost forgot it on my bed room door knob (where it lives when I'm doing dishes). Thankfully I could feel it missing from my wrist and went back for it.

I'm always nervous on these days. Especially when the weather reminds me of that first mammo where they found the mass. It's like ghost stories where they say "it was a night JUST like this" then large Marge scares the shit out Pee Wee.