I thought it was a myth...MYTH MYTH!

Yes????

Anyway, so I've heard for years this poppycrap about how exercise helps you feel less stressed and assists in the coping with stress. This sounded like a total bunch of hype made up by people with lab coats who eat wheat germ and carob or whatever.

Guess what though. It's totally true. Jason and I had our first official work out at the YMCA last night and I gotta tell ya....I was stressed OUT before hand due to work BS but 45 mins on the cardio and I felt clear headed and ready to get fit. I've never felt like that before. I slept great which is REALLY new to me and I felt.....wait for it.....good about myself. I guess these hippy doctor wheat germ freaks were right on many counts.

I honestly can't wait to get back there tonight! That is so unlike me I almost feel like I've been body snatched. Whatever works.

All this time I've been trying to eat a ton less to lose weight but all along I could have been working out AND not hating it! I mean I'll keep eating less of course but I had no idea there was something out there that would get me off the ledge that fast on a stressful day. Lovely!

What else. Oh work is weird today. Good thing I'm working out afterwards!

Would you like to see a picture? Well I don't have one today. But I'll try to find something to take a picture of tonight. Just try and hang in there until then. I'm open to suggestions.

Best Weekend Ever.

For real yo. I'm way cranky today because it was just that great that today HAS to totally blow by comparison. We had such a great weekend starting on Friday all the way through last night. Friday we did some serious Guitar Hero 80's jamming at Fred's. Then Gena and Sat showed up and Sat fronched the dog.

Saturday was Jason's b-day so we had a cook-out beach party. It was a blast. Except for Tyler. He almost ruined it with his GD Popsicle antics. Just kidding. Everyone was a pleasure.

Most importantly Jason had a blast. Just watching him play washers and grill hot dogs and throw the Frisbee made my summer. That boy loves a beach cook-out more than anyone I've ever had the luck to know. He was getting ready before we left and he said "I think today calls for my World's Greatest Grandpa t-shirt!" It actually says "This Is What A Great Grandpa Looks Like" and it's MY shirt but it was his birthday so I silently decided he could just have it. Then he couldn't decide between his signature railroad hat or his new Cubs hat. I reminded him that the railroad hat was, indeed, his signature and he agreed that was the best choice.

He slays me.

Anyway, here are some pics Gena took at the party. They are better than my cell phone pics so I'm stealing them.

Here is the birthday boy looking at some corn so good it might make him cry. I swear he was smiling like a goofball right before this, because that is NOT what a great grandpa looks like.

Fred & Sat. It appears Sat is asking for more corn. Fred appears to be rejecting his request.

Tyler & Fred. Fred only makes trades with others who are wearing striped shirts.


Gena & Sat are the only smarty pants that thought to bring an umbrella. Show offs.

Then yesterday Jason and I stayed home all day and I cleaned the living hell out of my apt. It felt so good. I even washed rugs. I realize normal people do this all the time but for me it was a great accomplishment. Then we got cleaned up and went to a SUPER delicious bistro and ate super delicious food. Then we came home and enjoyed our clean new apartment and went to sleep.

Now I'm mad because of work. And because I'm a damn whippet again. That is a test to see if you really read my blog every day or not. If you do then you know how much I hate being a whippit.

Baby...Can't We Give It One More Try?

That's what my vacation pictures just asked me. They also bought me flowers (a lilly and some lilacs..how did they know??) and a box of noodles with cheese on them. How could I resist?

Okay. One last try pictures. But we are on THIN ice lovah.

Here is me at the Ritz Carlton Eno drinking wine. My teeth look a little "i vant to suck your blahhd" but other than that I am actually pleased with this picture of me for once.

Here is Jason taking a picture of the sunset with our real camera on our last night. I love this picture of him for some reason. He just looks handsome and serene.

Here is my daily view at the pool bar. Those are my toes. They matched my swimming suit. There was an adult pool and kids pool. The only difference I could tell was that there weren't horrible spoiled screaming children in the adult pool and there was a bar and a cute pool boy and free towels....other than that they were exactly the same.

And finally this is the view of the ocean from our resort. I usually spent half the day at the pool and then when Jason would get done at 3:00 we would head down to the sea and swim. I lost my sun glasses in an undertow one day but it was worth it because it made me laugh so hard I almost drowned. hahahahah...sigh....good times.

I should have some better pics from my REAL camera soon but for now this will help you feel as if I brought you along under the plane in our kitty carrier...don't worry....we tranquilized you.

Love,

Crescent

Pesto Chango!

I just dumped an entire dish of pesto veggie dip on our cubicle floor. Now it smells. Like pesto. Everywhere. It feels like it's in my nose forever. AND the reason the dish was full because I hated it and was going to throw it away. I threw it away alright.....up up and away.

It's because I'm dressed up. I hardly ever wear anything except jeans and t-shirts to work but today I felt like I should wear a damn skirt for once. That'll teach me. The universe can tell when I'm out of my element and makes sure to heap on an extra helping of putzfrites and spazioli on my motor skills.

I don't know what the hell is up with my pictures not posting here but my compy has been crappy all week so who knows. They aren't even very great pictures anyway. Just some sunsets and shots of me drinking wine. Nothing we haven't all seen a million times before.

What else. OH so Jason and I joined the local YMCA! We did a hand shake eye contact pact (those are legally binding in our marriage) that we were going to get into shape together. It's a relief actually. I needed a buddy but not a girl buddy. I am too insecure to compete with my own gender. Jason and I are both fond of some light, good natured chop busting so I think this will work out (ha!) well but without ending in hurt feelings and divorce. I'm going swimming tonight for the first time (at the Y. I've swam before people. I was almost world champion of swimming and water ballet at a very young age.....don't bother looking that up.....the records were lost at sea).

Here is a picture of Fred's boy feet in my girl shoes. Shoe Trade is one of our favorite games of all time. We've been playing it for years.

CRUD! This pic won't work either! Whatever. Just picture boy feet in my sandles. It's funny. I promise.

THERE! I fixed it. Here it is. I'm sure you've been on the edge or your seat praying this all worked out.

I HATE Vacations on the Beach!

Just kidding. We had a magical time and I wish I were back there in our fancy room drinking fancy wine and looking at the fancy ocean right now.

I have a tan for once so that's kind of cool in a pre-cancerous kind of way.

It's starting to itch. Are tans supposed to itch? Mine does. Or maybe that's just work.

Here are few pics.

Oh swell. It's not letting me add more pictures. What is that about? I'll fix YOU blog!!!!
Fix you good!

GD~!!!!! Something is wrong with my compy. Stay tuned for pics tomorrow.

Beach Beach Beach Beach

That's all I can think of. We leave tomorrow afternoon. AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! That's all I can say. I'm just so looking forward to tanning my fat areas to make them look thinner. I kid, I kid. "If you can't lose it, tan it." Hahahahha. Some lady at work told me they used to say that in the 80's a lot. I don't know if that's true but it cracks me up. Sadly since I am so fair skinned and prone to ER worthy sunburns I am going armed with two bottles of sunblock.

All I have left to do is pack, which should be colorful since I'm taking pretty much every clothing item I have just in case.

We have our company summer party today starting at noon so my vacation officially begins then. It's whirlyball again. Sooo much fun but I've got to be careful. Jason will kill me if I'm on crutches for this vacation.

Yur A Peein' Zombies!!!

This is a short nightmare post. I dreamed that I was sitting on my couch working on some writing (yeah right) and I heard a water running noise coming from the other room. I went in there and a freakishly tall zombie was peeing BLOOD on my wall!!!!!! What do you say about THAT??? BUT it turns out that some big publisher or something saw it happening and realized it was in my dream and said he would pay me "upwards of 1 million dollars" for the idea. I don't think I really know what upwards means in that context but I pretended I did.

I've been reading a bunch of stuff on Italian horror movies even though I will NEVER EVER see any of them because of the gore, but for some reason I like to read up on stuff like that. Movie reviews and all that. Anyway, I'm sure that's why I had that dream. I woke up to every hair on my head standing up though, I'll tell you that much.


PS - This is a day of wonder and magic. I just realized that this is the first post I've ever had an error free spell check run on. Usually I have upwards of about 50 mispellings before I post but not today!

I Shoot, I Score.

About a year or so ago I dropped a cashew down my cleavage and told EVERYONE because I thought it was so funny. Well it's not so funny anymore. Today I dropped one in there for the sixth time in about 5 months and said aloud to myself "OH for GOD'S SAKE Crescent!" (I sounded just like my mother too by the way, she said those words a lot as you can imagine).

Seriously though, that seems excessive. I don't drop any other nuts or berries or food stuffs down there. Just cashews. And as I eat them I can almost FEEL it happen before it does and it's like some crazy nuthin but net shot every time. Whoosh....right down the middle without even hitting the sides. Then I have to dig around in there and shake my shirt while hunched under my desk, hiding my nutty shame. The ironic thing is I can't make a basket, putt a golf ball into a hole, shoot pool or really make ANY kind of item in target EVER! But apparently I'm the Michael Jordan of cashew cleavage ball.

I'm A Damn Whippet.

I don't even get this but I do know I'm way behind on the game. I guess you guys can go in and answer questions about me and my daemon thing might change. Help me be a tiger or something cool, please. I don't wanna be a whippet. *sniff*

Happy Birthday Matt!!!

So glad we got to have such a fun night! I have amazing friends and you are certainly one of the best. This video is for you.....and eventually Elizabeth too!

I get to go HERE!!!!

Good Lord. I can hardly keep my head on straight. So, Jason has been invited to this majestic resort in Laguna, CA (winks at Hixx....you know how extra excited I am, don't you dollface). He's going to be doing some training for a wine bar at this hotel and they are paying for BOTH of us to come out there for FOUR days!!!!!!!!! We have never been on a vacation together besides our honeymoon in Door County, WI (which was lovely, don't get me wrong) so this is truly the coolest news ever. We are both losing our minds with excitment. My plan between now and then is to stop eating and try to tan my Powder white legs. Oh and I need a swimming suit. And a couple sun dresses. And some shoes.

I am the luckiest girl in the land!!!

Ambrosssssiaaaahhhhh

I don't know how this whole business started but this is today's office flashback video winner. Eva's pick. Try not to groove and jam. I am thinking of changing my middle name to 70's soft rock. Legally. It just feels oh so right.





I'll tell you what, David Pack has some flipping PIPES on him! He sings about "a wife" and what not but this album cover might tell a different story. Or maybe the bass player just had a few shooters before this photo shoot. I get huggy after shooters too.

I bet all their hair smells like Agree Shampoo. Sighhh.

Make a wish baby....

Hot Tub Party Funtime Weekend!!

Jason and I spent the weekend in Madison at my oldest sister's house and enjoyed their new hot tub. It was the best. Here is the view from said hot tub if you put your head back.

Plus it was just a really wonderful visit with my sisters and brother in law and nephew and parents and Jason. It's been a long time since he's been able to join me on a weekend trip. I told him how glad I was to have him there because when I go by myself I have a great time, but am always a little homesick for him. My dad gave him his old GPS system for the car so we took an "alternate route" home. It took us through old timey Stoughton, WI so Jason found a radio station that was playing music from the 30's. It was hilarious.

Speaking of being homesick for Jason, I leave tomorrow at the butt-crack of dawn for NYC for work. I'll be there for four days so I'll miss J and the cats but at least I'll have Eva with me. We are both really excited to enjoy that city. I have been there a bunch but always get super excited stomach when I get to go back.

Before I "start spreading the news" I have two more pics from the weekend to hold you over until I get back.

This is Smokey (my sister's cat)squishing out of a laundry basket.

We picked Fred up on our way back into the city and we all went for lunch. We challenged Fred to create a gourmet looking plate with his dips and pita. Not bad for a first try! He was allowed to use anything on the table. The vinegar on the tomato didn't turn out how he'd hoped but none the less...pretty gourmet. Or almost.

He calls this piece "The Perfect Bite".

All You Can Eat Shrimp Saves the Day!

Jason had an off day yesterday too so we decided to go eat at Glen's Diner on Montrose. We get there and it's ALL YOU CAN EAT PEEL AND EAT SHRIMP DAY!!!! It turned it around for us. We started having the best time ever. Laughing hysterically at pretty much everything. Eating plate after plate of garlic shrimp and then finally made the brave decision to try the spicy Cajun shrimp. I had about two before it felt like my lips were going to fry off. But Jason persevered and truly ate all he could eat.

Here he is with his FingerBowl brand wet wipes and a mouth on fire. I told him to make a spicy face.

THAT LOOKS VERY SPICY!!!!!

And here is our table looking like war torn Kosovo at the end of the meal.

THAT'S A VERY MESSY TABLE!!!

My point is we had a really fun night and sometimes that's all you need to get out of a funk. At least it works for Jason and me.

Oh and I ended up having SO much fun that I left my purse on the chair and didn't realize it until I was trying to head out to work this morning. I had to work from home until they opened up at 11 this morning. But it was a nice little turn of events because I had the most relaxing morning and a nice walk and an empty air conditioned train ride into work....I really can't complain. THERE's something new!!! Ahhh...I think that means my whiny week has come to a close and I'm back to my normal "life is good" self.

Have a great weekend!!!

Pobresita.

I don't know if it was that special on the Mayan doomsday calendar that I watched the other night (FYI we are all done for December of 2012 so....you know get your affairs in order and stuff) or if it's really early PMS but I am just so.....ugh or blah or wahhhh or something. Feeling sorry for myself about nothing which annoys the piss out of me. I hate that quality in others and hate it even more when it sneaks up on me about twice a year. Everything is great and fine and good but something is just off inside me this week. I think the main issue is that I have no idea how to be what I want to be. Or maybe I'm not sure what that is yet or something. I want to write but I also want enough money to get a couch and some rugs. These seem like small things but they are indicative of bigger struggles inside I think. I kind of just don't want to be an assistant anymore. But I'm really good at it so here I sit...broken hearted...came to be a famous blogger but only farted. hahahahaha.....that kind of just cheered me up. Fart jokes...is there ANYTHING they CAN'T do?

My good friend and co-worker, Eva, has been in the same boat kind of this week so that's actually been a great help. Yesterday one of the printers was beeping over and over and over and we had this exchange:

Eva - "Hey Guy, you're a doctor, right?"
Me (aka Guy) - "Not certified but yes. What's up?"
Eva - "Is there a disorder or illness that makes you want to kill someone when you hear repetitive loud noises?.....Or is that just mild depression?"

It cracked me up for a good hour. We decided it was the latter.

BUT I had a great time last night at Jason's softball game and have nothing to do tonight except relax and drink some wine on the porch so I'll snap out of it.

AND the guy next to me has the funniest sneeze ever. It sounds so angry. It rules.

PLUS it's Retro Music Video Thursday in my dept. and I won! The objective is to blow each other's minds with an old video from our childhoods. Here was my pick, which was just announced as the winner!



Here was the runner up which is also pretty rad:



and the bronze goes to:




All delightful memories. Okay I feel a lot better now.

8 things.

I hate mememememe's or whatever they are called. The name itself makes me feel car sick. But I'm also in a crappy mood so I'm extra negativo today.

Okay so Biddle asked me to do this meme and he is a friend so I'll comply.

8 things about your childhood that people don't know or something.

1. I never sucked my thumb or used a pacifier.
2. I cried whenever my Dad would talk about his travels because I pictured him alone and it bothered me. He was fine with it but one mention of him eating dinner and I would say..."Who did you have dinner with?" and he'd say "Nobody" and then I'd bawl my head off and they'd have to explain to me that he wasn't lonely on those trips. It made me mad at his job.
3. I was in a local runway show for O'shkoshbygosh which ended up being my first leg shave day as well.
4. I think I hold the national record for most goose eggs on my head in one season. I could list them all but I'm not going to. Just know they all were from me thinking I could do something I could not do. Result....giant goose egg.
5. I started up a protection service where I would walk home the smaller boys that had bully problems. I was bigger so the bullies left me alone and the wee boys got home safely. I did this free of charge but a lot of the guys would give me homemade cards or donuts as thanks.
6. The first time I tried a shrimp cocktail all the shrimp were totally uncooked but I didn't know they weren't supposed to be gray and didn't want to bother anyone so I ate two before anyone at the table noticed. They sent it back and I tried again that same night with cooked shrimp and have loved them ever since.
7. I drank half a bottle of Joy dish washing soap once. Nothing really happened except I got in a little trouble. And maybe my insides were streak free and spotless.
8. I had a giant birthday party for my favorite stuffed bear, Oliver, every fall when the first really windy day happened (that was how I knew it was his b-day for some weird reason). Like the kind where the wind actually howls. My parents let me take over the living room on those days and take the couches and chair cushions to make the party room.

Okay now I have to "tag" 8 people.
I tag:
Howard Jones
Whitney Houston
That's So Raven
Totaro
the entire 79 Chicago Cubs (counts as one)
that annoying girl from the Welch's commercials
Shakira
the cycles from CHiPs

PROOF!

I am not sure I've ever EVER taken such a bad picture but I was very very excited. Tracey the cat looks great though. In spite of her illness she's very photogenic. God. I can hardly even look at this picture....I look so very...special. I always flip my lid over celebs but Party of Five was like my everything during college and Bailey was my main man. PLUS after this picture was taken we all went out and he and his wife are so sweet and real and smart and great. I know I've said that already but, again, I'm a little excitable ever since that trip.

man. I'm obsessing about the badness again. The thing that really blows is the fact that I looked super cute that night and had just discovered via a friend's scale that I've lost 15 lbs. BUT I was all freaked out and it was freezing in L.A. so I had to wear my gross sweatshirt over my cute shirt and if I just had remembered how giant my face looks when I smile that big I would've held back a little.....dammit. I am reverse vain or something. I'll try and let it go in 3......2.....1. Done.

Have a good weekend little ones!

Auto-mo-beeel?????

That's right. We got a car. How adult are we? Very is the answer. Very adult.

So my jet setting May is finally done and I get a few weeks of recovery to prepare for the big NYC trip at the end of June. I'll do a quick re-cap.

Philly - Thought I would be bored but I loved it! Beautiful buildings, nice people, delicious beer. This is the only picture I think I have of Philly sadly. Oh no wait! I have more. Please hold (Rainy Days and Mondays Muzak version plays)......okay found them!

So this is a cool old graveyard.

This is my favorite Philly pic. It's a cool bunch of buildings in the South Street hood.

Okay on to Dallas.

Dallas was the friendliest but hardest to get around and hardest to find a sundries stores ala CVS/Walgreen's/Target.

The Book Depository was for sure the high light. That and a bar called Lee Harvey's. I don't feel like uploading those pictures. It was fun though.

L.A.! Loved it but never need to live there unless I'm crazy rich.

The highlights were seeing my BFF, Andrea and meeting her co-stars from the play she's in. Fat Pig was the play and it was wonderful. Scott Wolf was in it and we hung out all night! He AND his wife (from the New Orleans Real World) and Chris Pine (Just My Luck/Smokin Aces) and the rest of the crowd were all so smart and sweet and fun. I had the time of my life. And so did Tracey the cat. I'm thinking about starting a blog just for her but you can see some of her pics here.

Oh great. My pictures aren't posting all of a sudden. Now you don't believe me do you. I will try again later. But I swears I met Scott Wolf. Ask him.

Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes

So today is Jason's last day at his current job. The hours were insane and we never saw each other and all of a sudden a new oppotunity and career path opened up to him so he took it. He's nervous and we still need to get a car (it's a wine sales job so a car is a must) BUT I think he's excited too even if he won't admit it.

Selfishly I'm excited because I get to have him around again during the week AND on weekends!!! I can't remember the last time we had our weekends off together.

He has 13 days off starting tomorrow. I'll be missing a lot of those due to my crazy jet setting life style this month but it's going to be so cool to come back from L.A. and have him HOME on a Saturday night!

This post is kind of boring but I just wanted to say way to go Jason on trying something new and knowing when something old isn't working. Change is always weird and nerve wracking but mostly it's exciting and new. Like the Love Boat. (hahahah I typed "Love Bat" the first time....ahahah...now THAT would be some good television)

*That picture is of Jason in his work clothes trying to get in a quick song or two on Guitar Hero. His cab was literally waiting outside when I took the pic.*

I'm it.

I think this is called a meme which I say like this: meah meah. Anyway I have to do it.

A. Available or Single? No. That question is confused and I'm married.

B. Best Friend? Jason and Freddy and the Katzfey's

C. Cake or Pie? I don't really like either. I know I know I just don't. I like angel food cake every now and then. but not that much.

D. Drink of Choice? iced tea or chardonnay

E. Essential Item? Tide Stain Sticks and my insurance card

F. Favorite Color? Orange

G. Gummi Bears or Worms? Worms.

H. Hometown? Stevens Point, Wisconsin

I. Indulgence? everything

J. January or February? February just because it's closer to spring

K. Kids? not yet but I want one soonish!

L. Life is incomplete without - hysterical laughing

M. Marriage Date? Jason was my date to my marriage.

N. Number of siblings? 2 older sisters

O. Oranges or apples? Oranges because they smell awesome

P. Phobias/Fears? frogs and toads. *SHIVER!!!*

Q. Favorite quote? "Waiter! That mustachioed gentleman is eating my soup!" Jason said that out of the blue to no one in particular the other morning and now it's our new favorite quote because it makes no sense in any universe.

R. Reasons to smile? Guitar Hero and Jason and seeing my family this weekend and my sister's new hot tub and I get to leave at 11 today and have Monday off!

S. Season? I love them all but fall is my favorite

T. Tag Three. TAG - Let's play four square instead

U. Unknown fact about me - I have to hold a piece of my hair to fall asleep. I mean while it's still on my head. It's not like I have a bag of hair that I cuddle with.

V. Vegetarian or Oppressor of Animals? recovered vegetarian

W. Worst habits - relaxing too much

X. X Rays or Ultrasound? I've had tons of both. I glow in the dark.

Y. Your Favorite Food- spaghetti...I miss the days of eating giant bowls of noodles....sigh.

Z. Zodiac- Libra

Now that THAT'S over with I think my favorite moment of the spring happened last night. Jason and I had Matt and King over for some Guitar Hero and while I was jamming on a song I'd never heard of King said to Jason "Crescent is really good at Guitar Hero. I was not expecting that."